AARP
Thu., January 20, 02:39 PM
I have mixed feelings about the American Association for Retired Persons. They started sending me invitations to join, undoubtedly based on the kinds of books I bought, at least twenty years before I was old enough. When I reached fifty-five, I sent in an application. What they did was make my husband a member and append my name as spouse. If ever there was an organization that I expected to recognize me as a separate person, this was it.
There have been other times when their office staff really messed up. But I keep reminding myself that the dopes in the office are not the policy makers. And I believe that AARP is probably the best lobby for seniors (or near seniors). Consider this: the current administration – the same people who granted a huge tax cut while planning a war, those idjits who evidently don’t understand simple arithmetic – now wants us to take our own money and invest in the stock market instead of saving it through Social Security. I don’t trust them, I know they’re blowing hot air, but I’m only one person. Who is going to stand up for my rights? That’s where AARP comes in.
AARP also prints magazines and newsletters with fairly interesting articles and helpful information. (Sure, some of it isn’t so helpful, but that’s true of nearly any magazine I read.) A recent newsletter contained several related articles on how hard it is to work in Hollywood. We knew it was hard for actresses, but who would have thought it could happen to writers?
According to Larry Gelbart, whose impressive track record includes “M*A*S*H,” the only way a writer can keep from being fired because of age is to die young. Tracy Keenan Wynn, third-generation actor and writer with awards to his credit, is no longer wanted in Hollywood. Gelbart is still working, but these stories put me in mind of something I wrote in a post called The Gin Game a couple of years ago.
I don’t watch much comedy any more, because most of it just isn’t funny to me. When Carol Burnett, one of my all-time favorites, tried to do a new ensemble show a few years ago, she ran into trouble because there are no writers who know how to write her kind of comedy. (And evidently, there are none who care to learn.)
I’ve never watched “Saturday Night Live” because it’s on too late for me, so I’m not familiar with the writer who did the “Humor” column. He told about a new series he was doing, with a story line of four generations living in one house. Sounds interesting, doesn’t it? He withdrew his ideas entirely when the producer mandated that no actor over fifty was to be hired. He protested that someone would have had to become a grandfather at age twelve. “The audience won’t notice,” he was told.
And, as bad as that story is, he tells another that is even worse. He had a drama in the works, and the producer asked him to make some changes. “That female lead isn’t very pretty or sexy. Can’t you jazz her up a bit?” The writer pointed out, “well, Eleanor Roosevelt wasn’t known for being sexy.” And the producer said, “but if you made some changes, we could get Queen Latifah to do the role.” With all due respect to that talented lady, I have no wish ever to see her playing Eleanor Roosevelt!
Y’know, this whole situation reminds me of an old joke. The college graduate says, “Okay, world, I’m ready for you. I’ve learned my ABC’s.” And the world says, “okay, c’mon. We’ll teach you the rest of the alphabet.”
Do you think maybe the problem is that they never get past “I”?
