Feeling Lazy
Wed., August 30, 04:12 PM
I’ve been feeling very lazy the last week or so. It’s not all bad, of course; when I think of something that might make a post, I save bits and pieces for later use. I had a different purpose in mind for the following quotation, but it will work here.
I pulled out my Bartlett’s a couple of weeks ago to look for a quote. This edition is at least twenty years old, but the quotation I wanted is a lot older than that. I probably could have found it quicker through Google, but I’m beginning to think that search engines can make us weak or apathetic thinkers. (Of course, I heard the same arguments about arithmetic when pocket calculators came out.) In any case, I found what I was seeking.
When I was twelve years old or so, my mother wrote the following in my autograph book:
Thank G-d every morning when you get up that you have something to do that day which must be done, whether you like it or not. Being forced to work, and forced to do your best, will breed in you temperance and self-control, diligence and strength of will, cheerfulness and content, and a hundred virtues that the idle never know.
— Charles Kingsley
I was terribly embarrassed. I knew she was calling me lazy again, and it was right out there for other people to see! I felt no connection to the point of view, but I did remember it. Years later I came to see that she was right, although I still disapprove of her manner of telling me.
It is true that having a structure to your day is a good beginning. It is true that knowing something must be done, especially if you are the one and only person who can do it, may be the best incentive to get you out of bed. School, a job, babies – they don’t give you a lot of choices. I’ve done my best throughout my life to find something pleasurable about the things I have to do, but the fact is, I seldom say, “I have absolutely no reason to get up today.”
Leaving work last March was probably the best thing I did for myself in a long time. There was no pleasure left to it, and the strain of using my eyes on legal papers wasn’t worth whatever I was earning. (Which, as I found out, wasn’t enough anyhow.) Bosslawyer called me a few weeks later to inform me he had let the new lady go, and to ask me if I’d like to come in to train the kid he’d hired for the summer. I don’t think so. I knew there was something fishy when he promised the new lady twenty-five hours a week; he doesn’t want to work that many hours himself. Basically, he never gave her the chance to learn the job and fired her because she hadn’t learned it. Scum!
The Other Lawyer in that office phoned me last weekend. It seems that Bosslawyer has finally bought a new computer. Other Lawyer is installing it for him (of course) and needs the old software from the printer and the me 2000. Well, I bought the printer so I could tell Other Lawyer just where to find the manila folder with all the information I’d saved, including the receipt. As for the operating system, well, I never had that. The old computer had come from the ditzy girl who’d worked there before me, and she never gave us anything she didn’t have to. Not my worry, of course, not any longer. However, I have nothing against Other Lawyer, and I may need him sometime. (He specializes in real estate and probate.)
Anyhow, my days are easier. I still get up, wash dishes, make coffee, and get U.D. on her way. Eventually I have to wake Husband and give him his pills and his breakfast, but that’s not tied to the clock. I try to get in some computer time, as well as some sort of exercise. Being an archetypical “Little Red Hen,” I find myself walking through the house picking up after the other two adults who live in the Cheesebox – and wondering why I bother. All the financials. Most of the grocery shoppng. Most of the laundry. All of the trash and recycling. Who cares?
Over the last week, I just haven’t wanted to be bothered with much of anything else. Computer games suit me just fine. But here comes reality again. I guess there’s nothing like a swift kick in the conscience.
I have medical procedures scheduled for Friday, and yesterday I realized that I have no idea what I did with the instruction sheets. So I placed a call to the doctor as early as was possible this morning, and after an hour or so, the secretary did call back. I do need to know, among other things, what time to be there!
Last night I also discovered that the stove isn’t working. Except the clock. So I also had to get into the phone tree at General Electric. They do the best they can; they can identify me and my contract from the phone I’m calling from, and they try to schedule a convenient time for repair. They would happily send me someone on Friday. Oops! In case you have forgotten, this is a long weekend; next possible date is Tuesday. Be grateful for (1) microwave; (2) toaster oven – schwach but still working; (3) restaurants, take-out, ready-to-eat from the supermarket. We’ll manage.
But I’d better get out to the stores, because I may not be capable of much over the weekend. Not to worry.
