Liars
Sat., September 9, 12:19 PM
Things are a little out of sync today. Not only do I feel a little dopy, but my internet connection is playing tricks on me. Maybe it's the moon. I went into the kitchen around three this morning because I was thirsty. It was so light out on the deck that I thought it was almost time to get up. (That’s why I know what time it was; I had to check.) The full moon was so big and bright I could get my glass of water without turning on the light.
Unusual for me, I couldn’t get back to sleep again, and I realized that my aches and pains weren’t going to disappear without some Tylenol. While I was waiting for the pills to kick in, I started thinking about a short radio spot by Katie Couric, who marked the anniversary of President Ford’s pardon of President Nixon.
The announcement caused an general uproar. A pardon? The pollsters had never seen any president’s popularity plummet so abruptly. Ford explained that he thought a huge trial would divide the country and make it harder for the wounds to heal. And in retrospect, he was probably right.
There were a lot of jokes about Ford when he became president, how he wasn’t “the brightest bulb” and probably “played too much football without his helmet.” But he was an honest man who had the integrity to do what he felt was the right thing. Honesty and integrity – qualities that are in short supply in Washington these days.
Honesty led me to thinking about other liars and reminded me of a man who died recently. Completely unrelated. Boy, that moon was beautiful!
For a couple of years in New York, my friend Gloria and I worked under the same boss. I left the company – for various reasons – but Gloria remained there till she retired. Occasionally Mr. F. would say to her, “it’s too bad l’Empress left. Maybe I should have offered her more money.” Yes, a more generous salary would have been nice, but no one ever knew I left because he lied to me.
I’m not sure he realized what he had said. You have to have a better memory than mine if you’re going to lie to me. Mr. F. told me something about “the rules of the company,” not generally known, and I found out later that he had skewed them, and screwed someone else in the process. No, the lie hadn’t harmed me, although I was embarrassed that I had acted as if what he told me was true. But I don’t deal well with liars.
I am probably still too naïve for my own good. I always tend to believe what people tell me. (And, you may have noticed, I rant and rave when I run into people I can’t trust.) That’s not to say I never told a lie. “I’m sorry, Mr. M. is not at his desk; can I ask him to call you back?” He wasn’t at his desk, he was at the file cabinet; he didn’t have time to talk to salesmen; and whatever the caller thought I implied, I was only promising to give Mr. M. the message. And no, I wasn’t sorry!
There is also such a thing as a kindly lie, which is something we’ve all done. I remember a woman who would say to her boss, “you look tired this morning.” It was certainly more tactful than, “are you hung over again?” Even if he probably was.
As I say, I don’t deal well with liars. I become suspicious of any that I catch. The closer I am to the phony, the more likely I am to remove myself from his/her influence. It’s just too darned much trouble to have to think over everything someone says to me, to decide whether or not I can believe it. It doesn’t even matter if the untruth didn’t concern me or was presented to someone else. I just can’t live that way.
The saddest part of this whole thing is that it doesn’t change anything. The phonies continue their duplicity…but at least I don’t have to deal with it.
