Am I Supposed to Worry?
Fri., July 4, 03:02 PM
Note: July 1 is three years since Miss Neighbor-Next-Door fell and was taken to a nursing home after treatment at the hospital. She’s still there, though she insists she’s coming home. Yesterday her friend came by to check the house and found that the (substitute) mailman had left a lot of mail there, despite the forward notice at the post office…
Knowing how this can happen, I am worried about my friend Gloria. She has been getting weaker and weaker over the past year and still fights the idea of assisted living. So I try to keep in touch, and I still send the occasional “care package,” even though I have reminded her that I am getting older too and can’t always get out to shop or get to the post office. Usually I track the package online and then give her an extra day. (Because a neighbor may have taken the box in for her, or maybe the postman scanned it before he actually delivered it.) Then I phone to find out how she liked what I sent, if it was what she needed, and to give her a little time to talk.
There was no answer when I phoned, and I tried several times that day. She could be sleeping or just indisposed. She might be having a meal at a neighbor’s. I didn’t reach her on subsequent days either, so I sent her a short letter. Basically it said:
Well, that was more than two weeks ago, so I tried phoning again this week. No answer. I tell myself that her neighbors in that crappy little apartment house are really as good as she says. I try to believe that, if she had fallen or was sick, someone would check on her. Of course, no one is required to do so, and their own emergencies could easily distract them. Who would think of informing me if she were hospitalized? And there might well be a notification to hold or forward mail that is being ignored.
Now I’m beginning to be annoyed, even angry. Why couldn’t she move someplace where I would know she was safe, even if she were unwell? Did I waste those batteries and peanut butter — and postage! — by sending them to someone who is not there? No, that’s just a symptom of being worried.
Whom can I ask? I don’t know the names of any of those “good neighbors.” There is no on-site landlord. I don’t know how to contact the fellow who has her power of attorney. (Can’t google him because I never knew his last name.) I thought of calling the police, but I have no faith that they could help. And I’m sure she would be upset if I did that for what turns out to be nothing.
Which brings me back to, where is she and why has she not phoned or written? Yes, I am worried. In case you haven’t realized, I shall be most offensive when I hear from her!
